nsta’s new “story" feature may have just buried Snapchat
WORDS BY JACK CROSSING
Dearly beloved,
We are gathered here tonight to mourn the tragic loss of our friends: beautifying-filter-disguised-as-a-pupper, tomato face, and face swap? No one saw it coming, and just when ‘memories’ was starting to gain traction, Instagram shit on everyone (again).
With humble beginnings, Snapchat coloured the lives of all with a myriad of cheeky n00dz, dog shots (both figuratively and literally), and, well, more n00dz. These days, more and more of us were reverting to simple stories to medicate our friends with increasingly messy geotags on our European summers. The story, a cultural treasure, was the OG #breaking site, from the TSwift exposé to our iconic 200 second long night-out stories, where each click brought more joy and more scandalous hookups.
In the wake of the Instagram-Facebook alliance, no one has a chance. Insta 'Direct' was a punch in the stomach to Facebook messenger, 'portrait feature' a sure termination of Whiteagram, and now this… Instagram has claimed another victim in the famed Snapchat story. Let's face it though, we'll all still call it our 'snap story' or at least an “Insta story”.
With the feature, we’ll be able to upload photos and videos taken via the app to our profile to be accessed when by clicking on your DP for 24 hours only. It’s reminiscent of an archaic version of Snapchat with the ability to add captions and draw onto your pic/vid. The downside? No stickers, geofilters or face swap. The upside: you don’t need to figure out someone’s snapcode/username to see their story which means all your fave celebs’ pics are in the same place! This will also mean all your Instagram ~aesthetic~ icons who didn’t have Snapchat will now have Insta ‘stories’ for you to peruse at your own leisure. At this rate, it definitely won’t be long until Insta figures out how to include beautifying filters and stickers which means a slow suffocating death for Snapchat.
In memoriam, let us review some glorious mems of the past 5 years why don't we:
1. Not-so-innocent Kendall
2. Kim’s Tay exposé
3. Birth of the beauty-pup filter
4. When Ariana debuted the song of the decade
5. When Kylie and Blac were "best friends the whole time"
It was nice knowing you Snapchat, we don’t know what’s next for you. One thing we can guarantee however is that Tay will be thrilled to be finally excluded from this Snapchat narrative, one that she never asked to be a part of, since 2011.
Sorry Miranda, looks like your new billionaire fiance will be on a budget soon.
At this stage we can't do much else but learn to love, because change is upon us, whether we like it or not.
RIP SNAPCHAT. 2011-2016.