“I am not against big benches, per se. Rather, what I am against is The Big Yellow USU Bench. In truth, I abhor it with every fibre of my being. There is something wretchedly ironic about its existence, about its pathetic pleading.”

“I had bared my heart and my feelings were seemingly reciprocated, sharing five years of itemised service invoices, lamenting night shifts, even travelling to the south side of the Bridge for me.”